A Room of One's Own? When Siblings Share Rooms

随着住房市场和整体经济继续萎靡，一些家庭开始转向之前在豪宅时代已经过时的一种选择：让子女共用房间。无论是在全球范围内，还是从历史上看，孩子拥有单独卧室的情况都不多见，并非普遍规律。世界上大多数孩子都是跟兄弟姊妹共用卧室，有时是跟自己的父母。但在美国，这些年来房子越造越大，而每个家庭的子女数量仍稳定在2个左右。据《华盛顿邮报》援引统计数字说，1991年，美国家庭住宅平均面积是1,672平方英尺，有53%的家庭拥有三间或三间以上卧室。到2007年，平均面积上升到1,789平方英尺，卧室不少于三间的家庭比例达到60%。Associated Press但是，由于经济形势窘迫，这种让每个孩子拥有自己领地的潮流或许将发生改变。因为大房子价钱过高不敢问津，或者原有住房难以出手，越来越多的家庭只好将就。比如在曼哈顿，全家挤进只有一间卧室的公寓的家庭增多了。《纽约时报》根据对曼哈顿地区统计数字的分析说，2000-2006年间，有一个以上6岁以下子女全家住在单卧室公寓的家庭数在增加，其中，此类白人家庭的增幅是31%，非洲裔美国家庭的增幅是19%。在考虑是否让子女共用卧室时，空间限制和财力状况是主要因素。但是儿童发育专家说，考虑子女的年龄脾气性别和隐私也很重要。如果你有一个夜里经常哭闹的小婴儿，还有一个睡觉很轻的4岁孩子，那么，让他们共处一室可能会让孩子和父母都非常疲乏和暴躁。还有，在孩子都还在学步的年龄时，让男孩和女孩住在一起或许没什么问题，但当他们逐渐长大开始有不同的兴趣（比如女孩处于“公主时期”，而男孩却痴迷于卡车），以及开始察觉到他们身体的差异时，再让他们用一个卧室就会变得尴尬了。我和我的姊妹小时候都有自己的卧室。我一直是个非常独立的人，很看重自己的隐私和独处的机会，而且，跟室友共用房间的时候我总是感到很不自在。（跟我现在的丈夫搬到一起让我花了很长时间才适应。）或许，这些特性是我成长过程中拥有自己单独房间的结果。但是，我儿子将来很可能得跟他弟弟或者妹妹共用房间，至少在他学会走路之前，因为我们家要负担比现在大的房子会很困难。其实我也喜欢让孩子共用房间的想法，我希望，这能让他们学会合作和分享。读者诸君，不论是作为父母还是作为子女，你在共用房间方面有什么经历？眼下的经济形势对你决定是否让孩子们共用房间有什么影响吗？Rachel Emma Silverman相关阅读什么时候可以当着孩子吵架？ 2009-04-10孩子，经济危机来了 2009-04-06孩子礼节也要与时俱进？ 2009-03-26最有效的教育工具：家族老故事 2009-03-19


As the housing market and economy continue to flounder, families are turning to an option that was out of vogue during the McMansion age: having siblings share rooms.Globally, and historically, private bedrooms for siblings have been the exception, rather than the rule. Most children around the world share bedrooms with their siblings, and sometimes with their parents. But in the U.S., houses have grown larger in recent years, while family sizes have remained roughly steady at around 2 kids. In 1991, the average American home had 1,672 square feet and 53 percent had three or more bedrooms, according to the Washington Post, citing Census data. By 2007, it had grown to 1,789 square feet, and more than 60 percent had three or more bedrooms.But the trend toward each child having their own domain may be changing due to economic constraints. Growing families are getting priced out bigger homes, or are having trouble selling their existing places, so they're making do. In Manhattan, for instance, more families are cramming into one-bedroom apartments. From 2000 to 2006, there was a 31% jump in the number of white families and a 19% increase in African-American families with one or more children under the age of 6 living in one-bedroom apartments, reports the New York Times, using an analysis of Manhattan census data.When considering whether to have siblings share rooms, space constraints and finances play a major role. But it's also important to consider the sibling's ages, temperaments, genders and privacy concerns, child development experts say. If you have an infant who gets up frequently through the night and a 4-year-old who's a light sleeper, having them share rooms might lead to some pretty tired, cranky kids and parents. And while having boys and girls share rooms might be fine when they're toddlers, it might turn awkward when they get older and start to have different interests (like a 'princess phase' and a truck obsession) and when they become more aware of their different bodies.Growing up, my siblings and I had our own rooms. I've always been a very independent person who values my privacy and solitude and I've usually felt uncomfortable sharing space with roommates. (Moving in with my now-husband was a big learning curve.) Perhaps those traits are a result of my upbringing in my own room.But my son will most likely share a room, at least as a toddler, with his future siblings, because it will be tough for my family to afford a bigger house. I also like the idea of my kids sharing a room—I hope it will teach them cooperation and sharing. (Here are some tips for decorating and maximizing space for shared rooms.)Readers, what experiences have you had, either as a parent or child, with siblings sharing rooms? Has the economy had any effect on whether your kids will share rooms?Rachel Emma Silverman